All quotes from
Pema's book
Compassion
-- our ability to feel the pain that we share with others. Without realizing it we continually shield
ourselves from this pain because it scares us.
Based on a deep fear of being hurt, we erect protective walls made out
of strategies, opinions, prejudices, and emotions.
Ordinarily
we are swept away by habitual momentum.
We don't interrupt our patterns even slightly. With practice, however, we learn to stay with
a broken heart, with a nameless fear, with a desire for revenge. Sticking with uncertainty is how we learn to
relax in the midst of chaos.
Meditation
practice isn't about trying to throw ourselves away and become something
better. It's about befriending who we
are already.
We should
never underestimate our low tolerance for discomfort.
Refraining
is very much the method of becoming a dharmic person. It's the quality of not grabbing for
entertainment the minute we feel a slight edge of boredom coming on. It's the practice of not immediately filling
up space just because there's a gap.
We might
as well stop struggling against our thoughts and realize that honesty and humor
are far more inspiring and helpful than any kind of solemn religious striving
for or against anything.
When
things fall apart, instead of struggling to regain our concept of who we are,
we can use it as an opportunity to be open and inquisitive about what has just
happened and what will happen next.
Connecting
with our experience by meeting it feels better than resisting it by moving
away. Being on the spot, even if it
hurts, is preferable to avoiding. As we
practice moving into the present moment this way, we become more familiar with
groundlessness, a fresh state of being that is available to us on an ongoing
basis.
Openness
doesn't come from resisting our fears but from getting to know them well.
We don't
sit in meditation to become good meditators.
We sit in meditation so that we'll be more awake in our lives.
Pain is
not punishment; pleasure is not a reward.
When we
say, "I take refuge in the Buddha", it means I take refuge in the
courage and the potential of fearlessness, or removing all the armor that
covers this awakeness of mind.
The basic
instruction is simple: start taking off that armor. That's all anyone can tell you. No one can tell you how to do it because
you're the only one who knows how you locked yourself in there to start.
Now--
that's the key. Mindfulness trains us to
be awake and alive, fully curious, about now.
The out-breath is now, the in-breath is now, waking up from our
fantasies is now, and even the fantasies are now. The more you can be completely now, the more
you realize that you're always standing in the middle of a sacred circle.
Wholeheartedness
is a precious gift, but no one can actually give it to you. You have to find the path that has heart and
then walk it impeccably.
When you
start to want to live your life fully instead of opting for death, you discover
that life itself is inconvenient.
Begin
with being willing to feel what you are going through. Be willing to have a compassionate
relationship with the parts of yourself that you feel are not worthy of
existing.
The idea
of karma is that you continually get the teachings you need in order to open
your heart.
The
causes of aggression and fear begin to dissolve by themselves when we move past
the poverty of holding back and holding on.
Clarity
and decisiveness come from the willingness to slow down, to listen to and look
at what's happening.
The more
you're willing to open your heart, the more challenges come along.
As long
as you're wanting yourself to get better, you won't.
Noticing
where we open up and where we shut down -- without praise or blame -- is the
basis of our practice.
Gloriousness
and wretchedness need each other. One inspires us, the other softens us. They
go together.
Patience
is not learned in safety. It is not
learned when everything is harmonious and going well.
Be
curious about the neurosis that's bound to kick in when our coping mechanisms
start falling apart.
This is
the path we take in cultivating joy: learning not to armor our basic goodness,
learning to appreciate what we have.
